| Bruce Banner says: |
[23 May 2007|02:35pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
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music |
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Nine Inch Nails - Deep |
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Sci Fi Channel is playing old episodes of The Incredible Hulk.
Bruce Banner told some rodeo cowboy:
"Hey...rodeo clowns save lives...every day!"
And yes he was super intense and serious about it.
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[21 Feb 2007|01:54pm] |
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mood |
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 contemplative |
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music |
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Mindless Self Indulgence - Pay For It |
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I was rummaging around my room and found this.
It's something I wrote a long time ago...but I don't remember exactly what for. I can tell I did it at my old job because of the paper it's on. I don't completely remember writing it though...which is why I find it even more interesting.
Sitting alone in quiet contemplation
Weighing one option against three others
Brain is always turning, churning, spinning, mulling
Over every little speck of every little idea
Second guessing every outcome
Mind racing out of control
Barely grasping every thought and emotion
Every fact and theory
Synapses firing across the gray mass
Trying to determine what the result will be
Imagination tearing everything apart
Studying every and all findings
Judgments that may change
A life
A habit
An opinion
Or nothing at all
The ideas never stop
No matter how monumental or minute
Always banging around inside the skull
Begging to run their course
No matter their merit
I honestly don't even remember if I was going to write more or what.
But I found it...and there it is. *Shrug*
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[28 Oct 2006|07:49pm] |
Why you wish you lived near me:
Tonight...B Movie night, w0rd!
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| 4 Words. |
[13 Oct 2006|08:42pm] |
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music |
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Electric Six - Improper Dancing |
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Fuck Snow In October.
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| Fun ways to fuck with people at work 101 |
[18 Sep 2006|03:23pm] |
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mood |
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 working |
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music |
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The many sounds of Ballas...including my inside screaming |
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Ok so...here's the setup...
1. A horny old guy that make all sorts of vulgar comments concerning women and what they would do if they got this woman or that woman. (Quite a few here like that actually.)
2. They are all completely computer illiterate.
3. Now and then they either figure out or ask me to make a hot girl on the internet the wallpaper on the computer.
4. I made this their wallpaper.
5. Bring up Internet Explorer on google.com to cover it up and wait for someone to minimize.
6. Hear lots of "OH MY GOD! WHAT THE FUCK! SON OF A BITCH!"
7. Laugh to self.
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[12 Sep 2006|01:54am] |
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mood |
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 weird |
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music |
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Method Man - Release Yo' Delf |
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Ok sooo...first off...this guy.
Yeah, that's like a 40ish year old guy wearing super baggy clothes...and to top it off his socks come up to meet the bottom of his "shorts" or whatever the fuck you want to call them.
Then some stuff I should put behind a cut because it is naughty...I couldn't believe this guy had this in his car.
( Naaaaakeeeeeeed )
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[21 Aug 2006|11:17pm] |
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mood |
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 giggly |
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music |
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Nelly Furtado - Promiscuous |
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Ok so...fun story time.
First off I work in the service department of a dealership. I wash the customer cars and bring them around to them. That is important to know.
There's this customer who has come in several times and has been a dick. He is old and ornery and probably has nothing better to do than bug me.
I would be busy and running all over the place and this guy would follow me around and complain and cuss at me. He has this thing about his whitewalls on his car and them getting cleaned. He also doesn't like to wait even if there were many people ahead of him. I have a problem with this, so we have gotten into it a few times.
Another important note is the fact that I have been stressed out for various reasons as of late and one of them is the fact that I am going to work 12 days in a fucking row. So I am easily irritable. And for those who aren't good at math...ornery old man dickhead annoying mother fucker + irritable yet still sweet Ben = face punching.
So I see him today and I think "Jesus christ I don't want to get into it...especially this week." And I start avoiding him as best I can.
He ends up going into a part of the building that I was walking through and as I was walking away with my back to him he says "Hey when you....hey!" And as the door shut behind me I heard "Is he hard of hearing or something?" That made my brain start thinking fun things. And I started laughing to myself and hatching a fun plan.
I took his car and parked it next to the wash bay area where I could spray his god forsaken white walls. Grabbed another car to wash while I waited for the other one to get open...and ran that through the car wash. This guy started hanging around the car wash waiting for me to get out. I drive out, park the car and dry it off.
After I had it all dried and started to walk I heard him again..."Hey!....HEY!...HEY YOU!" He was getting so loud that people around were getting confused if he was talking to them or not. I went up to the trashcan to throw the plastic and paper mats away and he came walking up to me.
Now at this point I was psyching myself up for what I wanted to do....to do it I could not laugh.
Unfortunately the story will lose some "oomf" here because you can't hear my voice, but he came up and started talking to me. I motioned for him to stop...and I acted like I was deaf.
Yes...that's right...and we are talking awesome voice and hand motions. Apparently I can act out deafness quite well...everyone said I sounded exactly like people they knew that were deaf. He looked at my kind of funny and proceeded to yell right at my face so I could hear him. I don't even know how many times I made him repeat himself. The guy must have either forgotten or didn't recognize me because he hardcore bought it.
And I understand that some of you might be offended...but I so avoided any kind of conflict and had fun doing it. I lightened up my week a ton to boot. The guy was way too busy trying to get me to understand him to go about demanding things like an ass. And not to mention since I did the "I have always been deaf" voice, I think he even felt a little sympathetic.
Score one for Ben!
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| Saw this on someone elses... |
[19 Aug 2006|08:41pm] |
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mood |
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 amused |
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music |
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Tool - The Pot |
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Results
Based on your answers to the above questions, your current life expectancy is 65 years. If you're not happy with the result, consider that by adopting a healthier lifestyle and avoiding various risk factors, you can increase your life expectancy by up to 15 years.
Your "ideal" weight for maximum longevity is: 167 lbs.
The three biggest positive factors that you have going for you are:
1. Personality type
2. Drinking
3. Weight
The three biggest negative factors that you have going for you are:
1. Family health
2. Gender
3. Diet
Ok guys....who knows a good plastic surgeon? I need to switch genders stat! It will add 15 years! =D
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[05 Aug 2006|02:51am] |
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mood |
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amused |
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music |
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Screaming Mechanical Brain - Wundershozen |
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"Hey, Ben, why do you think the place you work is full of morons? Can you give us an example?"
Well yeah ok I guess...one thing is this sign that's posted up on the wall.
In case you didn't notice...it says "dorr" instead of "door". I really hope you noticed.
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[22 Jun 2006|06:30pm] |
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mood |
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 woot! |
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music |
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Mindless Self Indulgence - Pay For It |
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So...tomorrow I will be going to North Carolina, Outer Banks and will be there for the whole next week.
My friend's brother couldn't go with his family...so since I am pretty much family I got asked.
It was extremely short notice, but I was all for it. Pretty much completely free besides the gas in my car. So...F yeah I'm going.
My boss didn't seem too pissed when I asked for the whole next week off either. =P
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[20 Jun 2006|07:14pm] |
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mood |
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amused |
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music |
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Tiny Tim - Having A Wonderful Time |
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Ok...my friend made this and told me "You are one of the only people I know that will appreciate this...everyone else thinks I'm sick."
Oh god yes...I laughed so damn hard.
http://gmanstalksbarney.ytmnd.com/
Probably helps if you've played Half-Life.
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[30 May 2006|12:08am] |
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mood |
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weird |
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music |
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Bush - 40 Miles from the Sun |
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Wow...
I log on to aim and someone said "Just 15 minutes until your birthday!"
I completely forgot about my birthday.
Wow...
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[24 May 2006|11:20pm] |
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music |
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Marilyn Manson - Tourniquet |
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So today at work someone had their Ipod hooked up to the radio and Michael Jackson was playing....back when he was good.....before the whole white child molesting woman thing.
And I decided it would be funny if when someone was pissed they started doing Mike's bad ass moves.
Like:
The Leg Snap
The Finger Twiddle
The Bad Ass Lip Curl/Sneer Thing
The Crotch Grab (With Optional Yell)
The Moonwalk (Obviously)
So every once in a while I would walk past the guy with the Ipod and say
"Oh you mother fucker!" *Leg Snap* *Finger Twiddle*
Others were confused and/or scared...but he got it...that's all that matters.
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[28 Mar 2006|01:03pm] |
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mood |
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working and annoyed |
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music |
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air rachets, engines and squeeling tires |
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I feel the need to update with something.
Well first off work is pissing me off again. Just found out today that for 3 weeks now they have been altering my time-clock (and no...they aren't giving me more hours). So I'm pissed about that. I am going to try to solve it peacefully first...then I will call wage and labor. The absolute last resort is the one where I come in with weaponry of some sort and start slaughtering people. As much as I feel the need to do that I know I shouldn't. =P
More later I suppose.
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flatliner_00's journal
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